1) To make it straight, she pulls it. To make it stand, she rubs
it. To make
it stiff, she licks it. To put it in, she pushes it.
It is a hell of a job threading a needle!!!
2) A guy donated blood to his girlfriend. When they broke up, he
wanted his
blood back.
The girl threw a bloody kotex at him and said, 'I'll pay you in
monthly
installment.'
3) Girl in cinema turns sideways and whispers to her boyfriend.
'The man
next to me is masturbating!' Bf: 'Ignore him.' Gf: 'I can't.' Bf:
'Why not?'
Gf: 'He is using my hand!'
4) The Bio teacher draws a huge PENIS on the board and asks 'Does
anybody
know what this is? Dirty Harry says 'Oh, it's
a penis and you know dad's got
2 of them?'
The teacher says '2 of them?' Harry says 'ya. The little one he
uses to pee
and the big one to brush mum's teeth.'
5) 4 miracles of a woman
Getting wet without taking a shower
Bleeding without getting hurt
Giving milk without eating grass
Making boneless meat hard
6) What is the smallest hotel in the world? The answer is 'Vagina
Inn'. It
accommodates only 1 standing occupant with his 2 baggages left
outside.
7) Unborn twins saw a penis approaching 1st: Papa coming, papa
coming
2nd: U fool, it's uncle lah. Papa never comes with raincoat!
8) A hubby said to his wife, ' I will take a photo of your breast
and frame
it.' The wife said to husband, 'I will take a photo of your penis
and
enlarge it.'
9) A girl at 15 is a SURPRISE. At 25, she is the RIGHT PRICE. At
35, a GRAND
PRIZE. At 45, a CONSOLATION
PRIZE. At 55, she is a DOOR PRIZE and
at 65, a
GIVAWAY PRIZE.
10) What did Snow
White complain about after having sex with the 7
dwarfs?
Snow White said, ' I would rather have 7 inches at 1 time. Not 1
inch 7
times.'
11) The vagina is the world's best rehabilitation center. Even the
most
violent and aggressive penis comes out humbled, head bowed and
reduced in
size.
12) A loving husband had 'I Love You' tattooed on his dick. When he
got
home, he showed it to his wife. She said, 'There u go again trying
to put
words in my mouth.'
13) Lady was trying on dress. Husband: 'Your bum is as big as a BBQ
pit!'
Later in bed, husband said, 'Want to do it?' Wife: 'It's a waste
lighting up
a BBQ pit for a small sausage.'
